losing my religion

okay, time for a serious post... I love being a Mormon. I love that I know where I came from, why I am here, and where I am going. I love the peace this gospel brings into my life. but mostly, I LOVE temples. look at how beautiful the salt lake temple is! I love what goes on in there and I love how close I feel to God when I attend. I love the covenants I made with God, and I love what keeping those covenants does for my life. but lately I feel like temples are the only thing keeping me going.

I remember when I was younger, especially when I was in young women's and my frist couple of years in the relief society of a student ward. back then, I thrived on everything the church said. the only reasoning I ever needed for anything was, "because the prophet said so." but now, its not that simple for me. I wonder if this is part of growing up, and faith changes with sophistication, or if I am indeed losing my religion. I really hope thats not the case, because I love it, and I never want to let it go. but, sometimes it has lost its charm. Not that it needs charm, but it seems to be missing something that I need. ....maybe it is just my inquisitive nature finally coming out, but I need more things explained than I used to. things aren't black and white to me anymore. And I find myself frustrated at times that we are told that things just are black and white, that they just are. I believe things are more complex than that. God is more complex than that, and maybe I won't fully understand it all until the next life, but what am I supposed to do until then??